| sooner than you thought or not? thats what im wondering right now
but anyways im shooting at another entry, if it doesnt quite come out, i know that this is deletable and i can try on a better day, hehe yup
well, i shouldve released my 5th song right now to the person that was supposed to get it, but unfortunately, she's either hiding or has somehow found her way into a very opaque corner of an extensive crowd, so go figure for me or something, but i can firmly deduce now that she most likely does not like me, which is fine with me. she left me a reeeeeally brief myspace comment, she apologized for it, but i have realized her subtle omitting of the &hearts Jamie part, so im guessing somehow, oh wait, oh crap, i just said her name didnt i? oh well, its not like she's going to read this...she found out and is trying to back away. but either way i need a definitive "no rick, i dont like you" from her so i can get rejected and get over her already.
believe it or not, there is other news. news that somehow makes me sad.
getting through visiting warren high (my old high school, for those of you that dont know that, wait though, no one really reads my xanga huh? i shouldnt delete this anyways though) but anyways, i met up with an old friend... before that though, i met up with another friend who stopped me in the hall, saying "heey, rick!" and she was not with her normal clique, i inquired, and found that she was no longer welcomed there... i was worried after that, realizing that i just havent turned around nearly enough times to take note of the world i once knew, changing... yes, all things change, but as far as me changing things, the permanence of the past is just so beyond reproach, it scares me a bit. now as far as my other friend, the one i was supposed to get to see, she had a chain of events that she bound my hands with as well... she broke up with her boyfriend, who had become my friend as well, in november. she didnt really want to go into it, which i understand, but that just filled me with a nostalgia for a home that i never again will return to... the world of two or three years ago, which i loved so so much.
which reminds me of i piece i wrote about 4 years ago... i was crying, those somehow turn out to be really good. i wrote the words after about 4 years ago so far, only one person has heard it, which is less than i can say about Jamie's song, which i heard from some friends was mildly successful... if you care how it looks it looks like this:
Reached by no face, and touched by no words
its the epitome of our soft absurdity
now i cant see
now as the lights burn out you step into the scene crying like we wish we knew why
now as we turn on each other, your magic takes unliked flight, please just sit by me yet you still run out
out like out was in to you
I want to cry
and be more than the tears that seep from my present to past
i want them to solve all of my fervant problems that further my state of disdain
so say you've been somewhere dont say you've been nowhere i know you're not going to lie
cause you stood aside me for a while, now he's there hand in yours, how can photographs lie?
the picture's still face down in my room
face down in my heart
Reached by no face and touched by no words
Now the malevolent roulette knows something i dont as it glares at me sideways
vultures pick up the cue but the moment is past due, do i sense hesitation in you?
follow me then good friend quite aways into the pride parade, now hone your baton skills
ovations for you a sensation anew at the one thing i cant beat you at
if today was like then and forever where those days no closer to you would i be
its like the painting you see where time is melting and me, im like fire to trees in this spree
the picture is still face down in my heart, face down in my mind
reached by no face and touched by no words
Now the malevolent roulette knows something i dont as it glares at me sideways
vultures pick up the cue but the moment is past due do i sense hesitation in you?
do i sense hesitation in you?
know that our lives couldnt ever be newer
on this island why cant i force a move?
is it the ocean? distance? complecance in just pitching stones to their splash that pave their way, till they clash?
now the days going old thus the story has been told cause we are all too old for stories now
and your need for me is mere so watch me disappear inspiration first, heart, soul, then love
its illusion forever was i really ever a part of your vibrant life?
still would you dance with a ghost if you lost all or most of your tangible world of pretenders?
yep, the music is quite simple, but that would make sense, cause i did write it while i was just learning how to play
anyways, ill leave you with that, me with that, whatever... take care and tats
-rick
|
